happigalblog

How Do You Really Affect People?

Tue, 05 Jan 2010 14:35:50 +0100

Wow. I suppose this can be a scary thought..."How do I affect people?" is a question that many of us may not want to answer. We are all out there, trying to find our way in the world, trying to survive, trying to make the best of things for our family and friends, right? But what is your influence? How do people really perceive you? What influence do you have on those around you? Do you like to complain? Do you recognize some of the negativity that comes our of your mouth on a regular basis? Do you constantly complain to others about your job, your spouse, your kids, your lack of opportunities? How do people feel after they've left you? Getting into the bad habit of complaining doesn't really help anyone does it? Ok, well, maybe the 'venting' feels good at the moment, but it serves only you, and then for only a brief moment. Wouldn't it be better to inspire? Wouldn't it make you a more pleasant person to be around if you stated more positive remarks than negative ones? What if, by being POSITIVE with your words and deeds, inspired someone to achieve their goals? What if, by focusing on the GOOD things in life, you helped lift someone's spirits? What if, by being more motivated, helpful and positive, you could help life your own spirit's? What kind of life would that be like?

Learn to Be Your Own Best Friend

Tue, 05 Jan 2010 14:40:12 +0100

I once struggled with self esteem issues. (Who hasn't?) I was able to read and study my way out of my poor perception of myself, but not everyone has the time, energy or resources to do so. So let me challenge your perception for a moment. Do you have a best friend? What do they think of you? Do you respect them and their opinions? Do you think they'd be best friends with someone who didn't have value? Your best friend is probably pretty smart, and HAPPY they know you. You know, there are a lot of people out there who will knock you down, dismiss you, and even attack you. But if you start by being your own best friend- give yourself a break, give yourself the gift of friendship, forgive yourself the way your forgive your friends, you are on the right path. Then, start sticking up for yourself they way you would for a friend. The end result of this is a new found respect for yourself. Just take a moment to view yourself the way a friend would. Pretty amazing eh? The road to happiness begins here at home my friends. Best of luck to you and your new best friend! Cheers!

Comment: cdriscoll@happigal.com

Evaluating Your Associations

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:29:27 +0100

by Jim Rohn

(I'm a huge fan of Jim Rohns, and this is a fab article, so I thought I'd let him do the talking today! ~ Happigal)

If you were to evaluate the major influences in your life that have shaped the kind of person you are, this has to be high on the list: the people and thoughts you choose to allow into your life. My mentor Mr. Shoaff gave me a very important warning in those early days that I would like to share with you. He said, “Never underestimate the power of influence.” Indeed, the influence of those around us is so powerful! Many times we don’t even realize we’re being strongly affected because influences generally develop over an extended period of time.

Peer pressure is an especially powerful force because it is so subtle. If you’re around people who spend all they make, chances are excellent that you’ll spend all you make. If you are around people who go to more ball games than concerts, chances are excellent that you’ll do the same thing. If you are around people who don’t read, chances are excellent that you won’t read. People can keep nudging us off course a little at a time, until finally, we find ourselves asking, “How did I get here?” Those subtle influences need to be studied carefully if we really want our lives to turn out the way we’ve planned.

With regard to this important point, let me give you three key questions to ask yourself. They may help you to make better analysis of your current associations.

Here is the first question: “Who am I around?” Make a mental note of the people with whom you most often associate. You’ve got to evaluate everybody who is able to influence you in any way.

The second question is: “What are these associations doing to me?” That’s a major question to ask. What have they got me doing? What have they got me listening to? What have they got me reading? Where have they got me going? What do they have me thinking? How have they got me talking? How have they got me feeling? What have they got me saying? You’ve got to make a serious study of how others are influencing you, both negatively and positively.

Here’s a final question: “Is that okay?” Maybe everyone you associate with has been a positive, energizing influence. Then again, maybe there are some bad apples in the bunch. All I’m suggesting here is that you take a close and objective look. Everything is worth a second look, especially the power of influence. Both will take you somewhere, but only one will take you in the direction you need to go.

It’s easy to just dismiss the things that influence our lives. One man says, “I live here, but I don’t think it matters. I’m around these people, but I don’t think it hurts.” I would take another look at that. Remember, everything matters! Sure, some things matter more than others, but everything amounts to something. You’ve got to keep checking to find out whether your associations are tipping the scales toward the positive or toward the negative. Ignorance is never the best policy. Finding out is the best policy.

Perhaps you’ve heard the story of the little bird. He had his wing over his eye and he was crying. The owl said to the bird, “You are crying.” “Yes,” said the little bird, and he pulled his wing away from his eye. “Oh, I see,” said the owl. “You’re crying because the big bird pecked out your eye.” And the little bird said, “No, I’m not crying because the big bird pecked out my eye. I’m crying because I let him.”

It’s easy to let influence shape our lives, to let associations determine our direction, to let pressures overwhelm us, and to let tides take us. The big question is: Are we letting ourselves become what we wish to become?

To Your Success,
Jim Rohn

Reproduced with permission from Jim Rohn's Weekly E-zine. To subscribe, go to www.JimRohn.com All contents Copyright © JimRohn.com except where indicated otherwise. All rights reserved worldwide.

Infectious Smiling

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 04:14:23 +0100

I was visiting a hospital recently, and, certainly they have their fair share of challenges and stressful situations on a daily basis. The elevator opened and was filled with anxious, dour faced people in painful situations. But I was in an exceptionally good mood one day, and at first, this group took me aback. Then, I decided not to join them, but rather to walk in with a big smile on my face- and I looked people in the eye. Well, it turned out to be a breath of fresh air for them! Very quickly, many of them smiled back, and kept that smile till they got off the elevator, I also gave them the 'Have a nice day' as some of them left- (OK unoriginal, but sincere) Who knows if it had a lasting effect or not. But at least, for a moment, their burden was lifted for a brief moment. And maybe one of them passed the the smile on to someone else. Anyway...I felt responsible for starting an infectious smile that day- and I think I will be starting even more of them from now on. Cheers!

Optimist Doesn't Mean Naive

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 20:09:35 +0100

People sometimes mistake a happy, upbeat, optimistic attitude with lack of common sense or someone who is naive. But I honestly believe it's a mistake to walk around dreading life, assuming it's all just a huge, long struggle and that we are meant to suffer on a daily basis. Life is what ever you make of it. There are countless stories of people who had nothing and created a life of abundance for themselves and helped others. They had to 'envision' it first before making it happen for themselves. I'm sure they didn't envision just a life of work and struggle- but rather, a stunning, and glorious, and happy existence for themselves in the future. What I've noticed in my own life, is that, just by changing my attitude to one of infinite possibilities and hopeful optimism, I've lead a happier, more satisfying life. Now who wouldn't want that?

An Appreciation of Things

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 20:10:06 +0100

My beautiful daughter in law has taught me many lessons in life. Her smile, her joy of life, her love of my son is a blessing that I'm truly grateful for. One of her daily habits is to take a moment before sitting down to a meal and be thankful for it. She is not just saying 'grace'. She is truly thankful for all her blessings, and for the meal set before her. Even when the entire family is out to dinner at a restaurant, you can see her gently take a 'moment' for herself, a pause, where she contemplates her good fortune, family, her meal and God. Recently, I took that same moment. I looked at the bountiful meal before me and thought of all the farmers who worked in the fields to make the wheat that became my bread, the chickens and their caretakers who delivered my eggs, the far off Columbian farmer who picked the coffee beans for my coffee. In one meal, people from around the world had an impact on what I was eating at that moment. A lot of work went into providing me with what I'd been given, including my spouse who'd gone to work that week to pay for my meal. Who could I NOT be grateful? I'd been given so much. When you stop for a moment, and turn your head slightly, it can sometimes give you a different angle to perceive life. It can give you and entirely new appreciation of things, if you just take a moment.

"Daily Dose of Optimism"

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 16:21:11 +0100

I started emailing friends my "Daily Dose of Optimism" quotes formally just a few months ago. It started when I was working at an accounting firm years ago (marketing dept). The team was going through a tough transitional time, and I started sending out optimistic, happy, 'you can do it' quotes to several close colleagues to help them keep their spirits up. After leaving the firm, I'd send one or two out to my former colleagues every now and again. I'd also send some to my family and friends. When I reached out recently to two of my former colleagues (who have since moved on professionally as well), two of them mentioned how much they miss getting their daily quote. It got me to thinking about how much influence it had on them, and I didn't realize how much they'd enjoyed it. I've enjoyed quotes for a long time now, and even used one starting at the beginning of classes when I taught briefly...So I started up Happigal's Daily Dose of Optimism! You can now get a daily email sent to you, that will help perk up your day, give you food for thought, or just put a small smile on your face. Sign up here! ~ Happigal

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Smile Through

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 10:54:32 +0100

During challenging times, it's easy to just stop and
think about ourselves only.
All our 'philosophies' and mojo like doctrines that
we hold dear seem to waiver.
All that good willed momentum seems to come to a
blinding stop and we think;
'Yeah, that is good during good times, but this is different.
It can't help me with this problem."
But the truth is, that is when we need to hold on to what we know works.
I'm always trying to find the bright side, the 'up side', the
silver lining in things.
It's a lesson I learned well years ago from my good friend JoAnne,
who despite being seriously ill, always looked on the bright side,
never complained, and always took time out to take care of her
family and friends.

This wonderful lesson has been my bedrock for years, and I LEAN on it.
Recently, some challenging times hit my family and it would
have been easy to just get upset, gripe, complain, become selfish.
But that is not the message I want to send out during my life.
I choose to still try and see the 'upside' of things.
You know what? I was able to find plenty of things to be
happy and grateful about.

If you CHOOSE to look at the bright side,
ESPECIALLY during times of trouble,
this optimistic view will actually HELP YOU get through.
Really.

~ Happigal

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Smile Lyrics
Theme Music for Modern Times
(Music by Charles "Charlie" Chaplin -- Lyrics by John Turner and Geoffrey Parsons)

Smile tho' your heart is aching, 
Smile even tho' it's breaking, 
When there are clouds in the sky 
You'll get by,

If you smile  thro' your fear and sorrow, 
Smile and maybe tomorrow, 
You'll see the sun come shin-ing thro' for you

Light up your face with gladness,
 Hide ev-'ry trace of sadness, 
Al -'tho a tear may be ever so near,

That's the time, 
You must keep on trying, 
Smile, what's the use of crying, 
You'll find that life is still worth-while,

If you just smile...

30 Day Happiness Challenge

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 16:21:47 +0100

People who meet me now think I've always been a happy go lucky person. But there was a time where I was very different. Where I saw myself and everything around me very negatively. Eventually, I got exhausted emotionally. I choose to make my life different, I chose to change my life by changing my attitude! After reading Claude M. Bristol's 'The Magic of Believing', I took a 30 day challenge of stopping every negative thought that popped into my head and replaced it with a new, positive thought. The result? Within 2 weeks, I suddenly started feeling better about myself, and started to truly appreciate my life, my family and friends. I was happier. My circumstances had not changed, but my attitude towards everything had changed. For the better! It had a profound effect on me. I wanted everyone I knew to have my happier perspective. So that is my challenge to you dear reader. Take the 30 day challenge. For 30 days, stop every negative thought that enters your mind and REPLACE it with a positive one. (This is important!) Let me know how you made out. Write to me and I'll post the most inspiring stories! Good luck and enjoy the challenge! ~ Happigal

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Happiness is a Choice

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 16:22:39 +0100

"If happiness is a choice, why not choose it?"
Every life faces challenges, difficult times, but how you face and perceive those challenges determines whether or not you will be happy, not the challenges themselves. You cannot wait till something is 'over' to be happy. You decide each day if you are a happy person or not regardless of circumstance. Yes, there are times that make you feel like- When will this be over, when will this challenging time end, when will it stop raining? But taking a positive attitude about these times can not only help you endure them but also help them end quicker. I believe that when you take a positive attitude about things that creativity flows towards you, helping find solutions to some of your issues, or at least helps you deal with them. Being happy despite the challenges makes you a happier person, someone others want to be around, and connected with. Being connected to others is one of the best ways I can think of to help almost any sitch. Today, I choose to be happy.

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